My special Grandma

Grandma at age 93

Grandma, Mom, and me in 2008

    My grandma Alber has been a part of my life my whole life (34 years).  She died on Thursday at age 94.  I feel incredibly privileged to have known her and called her Grandma.  She was a very special grandma to me and helped shape who I am today.  I thank God for her.
    My earliest memories of Grandma aren’t actual memories, just recollections of photographs my parents took.  Grandma loved to hold me when I was a baby.  She was always smiling and happy with me in her arms.  I remember being a child (maybe 5 years old) and loving the way Grandma would kiss me.  She would put her lips on my cheek and suck in to make a loud smacking/kissing sound.  The vibrations of it always tickled and always made me laugh.  She kissed me that way for many years even after I was an adult. 
    Playing at Grandma’s house as a child was always fun.  We’d play “Touring” or “Uno” or we’d dress up in Grandma’s old clothes.  Sometimes Mom would play piano and we’d all sing.  Grandma and Grandpa would sing sometimes too.  We’d help them snap peas or pick tomatoes during the day and we’d have fun catching fireflies in the evenings.  Sometimes we’d find locust shells on the trees too!  Grandpa would take us swimming or Grandma would let us come along to the grocery store.  It was a total treat when one of them let us walk to Dairy Queen with them!
    Grandma and Grandpa both loved to read and loved to play cards.  A visit to their house was always fun and relaxing.  My grandparents had a great perspective on life.  They were extremely optimistic.  They were generally happy.  They lived day to day with a peaceful purpose and didn’t get stressed out.  They had a strong faith in God.  They prayed for their loved ones.  They didn’t worry.          
    Grandma loved to bake and would often make her special brownies that I LOVED!  She’d make lemon bars and cookies.  She stored the cookies in her Dutch Maid blue cookie jar.  At Christmas time she made cookies shaped like Santa’s face (coconut beard, red hot nose, raisin eyes, red frosting hat).  On the wall, she always had a wreath made of M & Ms in little plastic baggies around a wire hanger bent like a wreath.  The grandkids had no trouble helping them get those eaten! 
    We always enjoyed Grandma’s meals too.  She was an excellent cook.  But, one of our favorite meals didn’t involve much cooking.  Grandma would slice up a summer sausage and cut up broccoli, cauliflower, cucumbers, etc. and then set out crackers and dip and we’d have a feast!  We loved it!  She also had a wonderful chicken salad made with grapes, celery, chicken, mayo and cool whip.  Yum!   
    Christmas with Grandma and Grandpa was always special.  We went to church with them.  They loved their church, and we knew they valued their faith.  At present-exchanging time Grandma and Grandpa gave interesting gifts like an “Ove Glove” or a lettuce chopper or a cookbook holder to us granddaughters.  When I was a girl they gave me a doll that had a bed made from a dish soap bottle.  It was very unique and I loved it!   
    Grandma had a way of always being able to show us grandkids she loved us.  She loved us all equally.  We all felt special around her.  We never felt pressure that we had to be good at a certain thing or make perfect grades or be the best at the things we tried.  We felt accepted by Grandma just the way we were.  She was good at reminding us that she loved us.  She was always interested in our lives and I always felt like she was one of my biggest fans!
    I loved to hear Grandma tell stories.  She’d talk of her father who had been a cowboy or her brother Bill who was the best cook in the house because he was so strong when he “whipped” something.  She told about how her father was not a worrier.  Her dad could sleep soundly at night even during the worst times of the Great Depression.  That made an impression on her and she always tried to not be a worrier either.  She’d say, “I have a lot of concerns, but I don’t worry!” 
    Grandma would patiently go through her boxes of pictures with me and tell me stories about my mom and aunts when they were girls.  She’d tell stories about their smart dog.  She’d tell stories about my Grandpa.  My favorite story about Grandpa was always the story of their first date.  They went out stargazing on the bleachers of Cotner College.  Grandpa was telling Grandma all about the stars and she was pretending to be fascinated by the stars, but she was really fascinated with Grandpa!  Later when he popped the question, they were riding together in the car and he simply said to her, “You will marry me, won’t you?”  Grandma was so excited and she leaned over to hug him and just about knocked off his glasses.  I love that little story.  Grandma and Grandpa were a beautiful couple.  Now they are together again, in Heaven! 
    Grandma and Grandpa tried to make it to the concerts and events of my siblings and mine when we were growing up.  It was always special to have them come visit us.  They lived about a ten hour drive away!  They attended all of our high school graduations and college graduations.  My sister Patty and my brother, David were married before Grandpa died and so both grandparents were there for those events.  When I was married in 2008, and when my sister Kim was married in 2010, Grandma came to our weddings (with the help of my aunt and uncle and parents).  It meant so much to me to have Grandma there.  She was so happy to be there too.  Todd walked her down the aisle at the beginning of the service.  I asked her later what her favorite part of the wedding was and she said, “When Todd walked me down the aisle.  He was so strong and I felt so confident.”
    I don’t think Grandma had many regrets in life.  But, I always knew that she wished she had gone to college.  She was one of the smartest people I knew, and yet, she felt like she was less than someone who went to college.  She was so proud of us grandkids for going.  And, she loved that I was a teacher.  She had wanted to be a teacher.  But, Grandma was a wonderful speaker and “teacher” for the CWF (Christian Women’s Fellowship) women.  She was very involved in that ministry. 
    The last few years of Grandma’s life, I spent time writing letters to her.  I would write and tell her of things going on in my life.  I would gush about my wonderful husband or tell about the latest book I had read.  I would comment about things I was learning in my faith.  I would tell her about my students or what subjects I was teaching.  I’d fill her in on anything I knew about what my siblings were up to.  It felt good to write those letters, like a journal entry written to someone who cared.  I felt like my letters brightened up some of her lonely days and that made me feel better.
    The last three years of Grandma’s life, I had my second grade students write birthday cards and draw birthday pictures to her.  She loved that!  We would call on her birthday too and sing to her.  She loved that too.  She would send Hershey’s Kisses to my class as a thank you gift to them.  They loved that!
    Grandma loved.  She loved her husband and three daughters and her many grandchildren.  She loved her friends and her church family.  My last conversation with Grandma was on her 94th birthday.  I asked about her caregiver, Dot.  Grandma adored Dot.  She said, “Dot loves me.... and I love her.”  I am so grateful that Dot could be there to show love to Grandma when the rest of us could not be there.  Grandma was easy to love and she has helped show all of us how to love better too.  Grandma equals love.

L - loving
O - optimistic
V - very good cook
E - enjoying Heaven RIGHT NOW!!!

   Grandma loved butterflies.  She loved the symbolism of NEW LIFE!  Grandma has earned her wings.  She has a new life!  I had a dream last night that Grandma was a bride about to see her husband for the first time on their wedding day.  Grandpa was waiting around the corner with the most delighted smile ever.  It was a beautiful dream.  I'm glad they are together again.

The happy couple